mlah The “culture” that has evolved here isn’t conducive to sissies

September 4, 2007

FHM Hottest 100 Women

Filed under: Misc — mlah @ 12:25 pm

so it’s been forever since i posted pics. or updated my list of 10. so i’m going to catch up first by critiquing FHMs list of 100 sexiest women.

there number one? jessica alba!

1. Jessica Alba – yep, she’s hot and in my top 10

2. Keeley Hazell – hot chick. no idea who she is. british magazine. she accordingly has huge boobs. like the brits like them. i bet she’s a page 3 girl.

3. Eva Longoria – eh. way over rated.

4. Adriana Lima – neer heard of her either hot latina.

5. Scarlett Johansson – overrated.

6. Hayden Panettiere – don’t know who she is. over rted

7. Cheryl Tweedy – don’t know who she is. i have a feeling that a lot of these chicks will be unknow to me. so. dkwsi. this chick is hot though.

8. Angelina Jolie – i used to really like her. but she’s off the deep end now. way off. i’d drop her from the list altogether

9. Emily Scott – dkwsi, but she’s hot

10. Elisha Cuthbert – tasty

11. Eva Mendes – hot. shouldn’t be this high.

12. Keira Knightley – hot. love her. too skinny though

13. Evangeline Lilly – the lost chick. love her.

14. Christina Aguilera – trailer trash girl. i like her though

15. Rachel Stevens – dkwsi, but i like. girls named rachel. hmmmmmm.

16. Kelly Brook – hot and tasty. dkwsi

17. Sarah Harding – dkwsi. hawt blonde

18. Beyonce Knowles – eh. hot but over rated

19. Alessandra Ambrosia – dkwsi. but needs to be dropped from this list

20. Cameron Diaz – still hot. but she’s here for popularity. she should be way down the list.

21. Jessica Simpson – hot hot hot

22. Nicole Scherzinger – dkwsi. eh.

23. Gemma Atkinson – dkwsi. big boobed brit blonde

24. Jessica Biel – hot hot hot. should be way up there.

25. Kate Middleton – dkwsi. drop her.

26. Holly Willoughby – kinda hot. dkwsi i think she’s a porn star though. quick search gave porn pics.

27. Nadine Coyle – nice lookin. don’t think she should be on this list though.

28. Carmen Electra – past her prime. drop her

29. Avril Lavigne – like her lots. should move up.

30. Lindsay Lohan – the inmate? drop her.

31. Charlotte McKenna – dkwsi. i like her though.

32. Charlize Theron – dude. she was soooo hot in the devils advocate. monetr freaked me out though. she’ll never be hot for me again.

33. Halle Berry – hot hot hot. move her up

34. Rachel Bilson – i’ve heard of her before. she was in some movie but i don’t remember which. move her up

35. Jennifer Aniston – i’ve always thought she was overrated. drop her.

36. Eva Green – eh. dkwsi.

37. Abigail Clancy – nice. dkwsi but i like

38. Joss Stone – dkwsi. ok.

39. Hilary Duff – never been a huge fan, but she is hot.

40. Kate Beckinsale -liked her since last days of disco. way before pearl harbor.

41. Hayley Parsons – hot! dkwsi, but i really like

42. Roxanne McKee – dkwsi. ok

43. Jennifer Love Hewitt – move her up

44. Maria Sharapova – she’s hot. but i’ve never been overboard for the tennis chicks.

45. Sienna Miller – nice.

46. Billie Piper – dkwsi. kind of like her though

47. Nicola Roberts – dkwi. like her too

48. Holly Valance – dkwsi. very nice. she belongs on this list

49. Ali Larter – dkwsi. i think most of the dkwsi chicks are big in britain. she’s hot though.

50. Anna Kournikova – another hot tennis chick.

51. Ana Beatriz Barros – dkwsi. hot latina. i like

52. Gisele Bundchen – hot

53. Peaches Geldof – is this bob geldof’s daughter? drop her.

54. Britney Spears – drop her.

55. Rihanna – dkwsi. nice

56. Natalie Portman – move her up

57. Mischa Barton – dkwsi. eh. overrated.

58. Imogen Thomas – dkwsi. drop her.

59. Michelle Ryan – dkwsi. eh.

60. Petra Nemcova – loved this girl forever. move her up

61. Kimberley Walsh – dkwsi. hot though

62. Kayleigh Pearson – dkwsi. i like. move her up

63. Tanya Robinson – dkwsi. tasty though. move her up too.

64. Alexa Chung – dkwsi. remove her.

65. Charlotte Church – dkwsi. youcan take this one off too.

66. Amii Grove – dkwsi. verrrry nice.

67. Myleene Klass – dkwsi. very tasty. move her up too.

68. Kate Moss – drop her

69. Fearne Cotton – dkwsi. take this one off.

70. Holly Newberry – dkwsi. she should be in the top ten

71. Vikki Blows – dkwsi. very nice.

72. Nikki Sanderson – dkwsi. nice.

73. Rosario Dawson – loved her in rundown. hot

74. Jenna Jameson – porn star. still hot though. she’s dating tito ortiz now. i think i can take him.

75. Kirsten Dunst – the little chick from interview with a vampire. now the spider chick. hot.

76. Danielle Lloyd – dkwsi. very hot.

77. Tera Patrick – another porn start. still hot though

78. Joanna Krupa – sweet

79. Tricia Helfer – you’ve got to be shitting me?! the cylon babe is only 79? top ten baby, top ten.

80. Abi Titmuss – dkwsi. eh. take her off.

81. Charlotte Marshall – dkwsi. nice looking girl. keep her.

82. Noemie Lenoir – dkwsi. ok.

83. Michelle Marsh – dkwsi. man, the brits like big boobied blondes.

84. Sophie Howard – and evidently, big boobied brunettes too.

85. Jenni Falconer – dkwsi. nice looking girl

86. Kara Tointon – dkwsi. nice looking girl.

87. Jennifer Ellison – dkwsi. like this one. move her up.

88. Melissa Theuriau – i’ve heard of this one! french newscaster chick. very nice.

89. Jaime Pressly – nice. can’t believe they have her this low.

90. Sophia Bush – dkwsi. nice looking girl. keep her.

91. Jennifer Garner – hot chick, but she may be past these lists.

92. Lucy Pinder – dkwsi. man! the brits reallllly like boobies!

93. Georgie Thompson – dkwsi. she’s good. she belongs on this list

94. Heidi Range – dkwsi. apparenly a singer? she’s good.

95. Abi Harding – dkwsi. plays guitar. drop her.

96. Melanie Slade – dkwsi. she’s ok. but should she be on this list? nah.

97. Pamela Anderson – past her prime. well. never really was that infatuated with her.

98. Emma Watson – a-hahahahah! the harry potter chick. um. ok. leave her here. she’ll be here for a while i have a feeling.

99. Ziyi Zhang – yep. hot karate chick

100. Lacey Turner – dkwsi. remove her.

notable omissions. paris hilton. anna nicole smith. the olsen twins. grace park. alyssa milano.

so i’ll update my top ten list complete with pics. look for it soon!


  1. They forgot Kristen.

    Comment by medium john — September 4, 2007 @ 1:20 pm

  2. i won’t post dirty pics of kristen here

    Comment by mlah — September 4, 2007 @ 3:50 pm

  3. There are no dirty pics of kristen!

    Comment by medium john — September 4, 2007 @ 8:41 pm

  4. who says there are no dirty pictures of Kristen? I mean…. Of course there are no dirty pictures of Kristen!

    Comment by Kristen — September 5, 2007 @ 10:27 pm

  5. Mlah, you don’t know who Kate Middleton (#25) is? What, have you been living in a tent in the desert for the last nine months? 🙂

    Comment by Mike — September 7, 2007 @ 2:55 am

  6. well, i did a little more research. i know now that she’s prnce william’s main squeeze. but i stand by my opinion that she shouldn’t be in the top 100.

    Comment by mlah — September 7, 2007 @ 3:27 am

  7. #49 – Ali Larter is the chick from the NBC series “Heroes”. Not sure if were able to catch that before you had to start picking sand crabs out o’ your skivies.

    Comment by RojoXia — September 9, 2007 @ 8:29 am

  8. shit.
    well, i’ve reached the end, & this makes me sad.
    I found this thing googling B-hut & just stayed up for hours reading until I got here. You’re quite intriguing. I’m mucho exitado for the next installment though.

    i have so many questions…

    Comment by Callie — September 10, 2007 @ 8:24 am

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