mlah The “culture” that has evolved here isn’t conducive to sissies

July 24, 2006


Filed under: Humor,Sea Stories — mlah @ 9:55 pm

this one time, jesse was soooooooo drunk!

he and haggus, i’ve written about the both of them before, took a little leave while in spain. i tried to take leave too, but as jesse and i were in the same watch section, they wouldn’t give us both leave at the same time.

swannie and haggus went to marbella, to try and pick up rich english chicks.

i had to work.

work for me occurred inside what the navy nammed a concentrically displayed antennae array. or a cdaa for short. but we just all called it the bull ring. even the local spaniards knew it as the bull ring.

no windows.

i was stuck

it was night

it was a saturday

i was in paradise and on watch.

haggus and swannie had a dilemna. they were in some posh bar trying to impress a pair of ‘birds’ with their knowledge of alcohol. strangely enough, that sort of thing works on brit chicks.

you have a job? you’re not a disgusting wideboy? you’re in with the brit chicks.

nobody in marbella knew how to make a simple margarita.

jay and silent swannie (NOT) couldn’t remember that last ingredient. you know the one? the citrus crap neither of them liked?

they called spanish information, because they were both too drunk to remember the phone number for the watch floor.

after getting the base operator, who gave them another number, and finally getting the number to the watchfloor, they dialed me.

now, i had this supervisor named doug babcock. he was like a 15 year first class. that means he’s only 5 years from retirement, and just looking to keep his nose clean til then. and he was afraid of swannie. he just knew it was swannie who was going get him in trouble. supervisors are kind of responsible for you like that. do something stupid, and your supe gets in trouble too.

the watch floor phone rings. doug answers the phone and it is a very drunk jesse. i’m busy working across the watchfloor, and doug comes running over.

that drunk fuck jesse is on the phone! and he says he has to talk to you! it’s an emergency.

doug was in the initial stages of a nervous breakdown. i’m very apprhensive about picking up the phone, but i have no choice.

we have an emergency dave! (i can hear chicks in the background) what’s that fruity liqeur? the one you put in margaritas?

triple sec?


the phone hung up, and i never heard from them again til their leave was over.

doug went outside and chain smoked an entire pack of cigarettes.


  1. Even Mrs Yup was laughing about that one!

    Comment by yup — July 25, 2006 @ 2:16 am

  2. boys…

    Comment by Jeanna — July 25, 2006 @ 6:02 am

  3. I drunk-dialed a bar in San Diego from Carmen’s to get the recipe for a drink called Monkey Piss – I think you had some.

    Comment by Mark — July 25, 2006 @ 9:09 pm

  4. Ever tried mixing Cointreau or Galiano instead of Triple sec? Makes for a much smoother (but more expensive) Margarita. This bit of knowledge from my old drinking days. DAD

    Comment by savagemod99 — July 26, 2006 @ 2:24 pm

  5. heck, I’ve never made a margarita and even I knew it was triple sec! lol

    Comment by Blondie — July 28, 2006 @ 12:15 pm

  6. Wow…I remember that – sort of. But you got to give me a little credit, at least I could remember the number for Information.

    Babcock…that baby.

    – JAS –

    Comment by The (Infamous) Jesse Swanson — September 5, 2006 @ 5:15 am

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