mlah The “culture” that has evolved here isn’t conducive to sissies

August 12, 2004

We’ve Been Duped!

Filed under: Politics — mlah @ 8:34 pm

Dustin Hoffman as Teresa Heinz Kerry

everyone knows that john kerry is running for president as the democrapic nominee, but who knew that dustin hoffman was running as first lady!

this whole event smacks of the stepford wives. where has john kerry stored the real prospective first lady away?

he has her locked away in a ketchup factory somewhere being watched so that tootsie can offer his one liners at will.

this also explains the sudden shift in political bent for teresa heinz kerry. she’s been the devout conservative for so many years, only to all of a sudden go flaming left?

NO, she was tucked away by the democrapic dirty tricks commitee and replaced with DUSTIN HOFFMAN!

FREE teresa heinz kerry!


  1. Oh, man!

    mlah: We’ve Been Duped! Seperated at birth?…

    Trackback by She Who Will Be Obeyed! — August 12, 2004 @ 10:26 pm

  2. man, can’t believe this didn’t evoke any snide ass remarks from f-n cheney!

    Comment by mlah — August 13, 2004 @ 5:30 pm

  3. Don’t you mean “Free Dustin Hoffman”?

    Comment by Steven A. Adams — August 14, 2004 @ 10:33 am

  4. this is a riot

    Comment by Uptown Girl — August 14, 2004 @ 2:34 pm

  5. That is absolutly hilarious!

    Comment by rachel — August 15, 2004 @ 3:18 am

  6. Awesome skin….very nice.

    Comment by Madame Butterfly — August 15, 2004 @ 1:40 pm

  7. Sorry, not quite substantive enough for my tastes.
    Are you sure she was a “devout conservative”? Former hubby Heinz was a moderate Republican, wasn’t he? And Kerry is hardly “flaming left”! Kucinich (my man) could be described that way: Dept of Peace, man! Get outta Iraq yesterday! Single-payer health insurance! Screw NAFTA! Tame Israel! Kerry, like Clinton, are pretty middle-of-the-road.

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 15, 2004 @ 8:50 pm

  8. That’s your opinion.

    From where i’m sitting, Kerry, and your boy the Kaiser Bill are flaming left.

    Once again, you have tried a favorite tactic of the left. The Jedi mind trick, and you have failed! no matter how many times the left tells us that Bill, and his like are moderate. BS! They are left.

    Bush is a moderate.

    Comment by mlah — August 15, 2004 @ 9:09 pm

  9. “Bush is a moderate.”
    Hell naw! Financially, diplomatically and religiously, he is a total freaking radical. Domestically and foreign. Pro-business like no one before him. Doesn’t even pretend to pay lip service to anything vaguely bipartisan. Starting the demoliton of abortion and Medicare? Forget the UN and Europe? Totally unprecedented, hijacking us into darkness (937 is the new US servicemen count). Oh, and he’s gonna lose, too, so it’s almost over.
    If JK and BC are “flaming left”, what does that make Kucinich? I’m just saying your terms are problematic.

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 15, 2004 @ 11:19 pm

  10. my friend tells me that bush did crack cocaine, and that he admitted to it. please tell me that the leader of the free world is not an ex drug addict.

    oh yeah, and great new graphics!

    Comment by medium john — August 15, 2004 @ 11:29 pm

  11. it is alleged that he did a little coke in college. unconfirmed as far as i know. crack cocaine did not exist yet when he was in college.

    he used to be an alcy too. but he’s been on the wagon for quite a while.

    come on john, you didn’t know that the founding fathers were all drunk when they held those continental conventions?

    i suspect he did a little more than inhale when he was in college. but then again, the democrat norm is to lie about it. except gore. i actually admire his honesty on that subject.

    Comment by mlah — August 15, 2004 @ 11:54 pm

  12. bush is a total freaking radical on religion? what he goes to church? oooooohhhh, lookout! he’s wacky! what a load of crap.

    he’s uber pro business? the business of america IS business. sounds like he’s taking care of business to me. that’s what i want. oh, i forgot, all you lefties hate the free market. the communist utopian state has no property after all.

    he spends money? well wtf? he had to confront a new type of enemy and start a new dept. and prosecute two wars (i can hear your fingers banging on the keyboard all the way down here in md) that costs money. but it’s an investment in our future, we shall reap the benefits of prosperity in the peace to come.

    as opposed to you lefties, give the money away. MY money. kucinich was radical left. kerry’s not radical left, he’s a whore. which way is the wind blowing? that’s his position.

    at least kucinich has picked a side and is sticking to it.

    Comment by mlah — August 16, 2004 @ 12:01 am

  13. “Bush is a total freaking radical on religion? what he goes to church? oooooohhhh, lookout! he’s wacky! what a load of crap.”
    He and Asscroft would be pleased as punch to deflate the ole separation of church and state. Every president has gone to church, that’s not my issue. It’s the whole “faith-based initiatives”– federal handouts, christian “welfare” (in the sense of the term that even you hate)– that piss me off. I as a taxpayer don’t think we should be supporting religion-tinged social services. It gets into discrimination in federally funded positions (“No Jews or Catholics need apply!). Coercion to convert. “Under God” in the Pledge was a cockamamie Cold War invention. Most Americans may be Christian, but America can’t be a “Christian Nation”, or even monotheistic (10 Commandments). No goddamned theocracy like Iran or Taliban Afghanistan here, thanks. School vouchers, judicial nominees, “traditional” family values, no sex toy sales in Texas, I could go on and on…

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 16, 2004 @ 8:19 pm

  14. “he’s uber pro business? the business of america IS business. sounds like he’s taking care of business to me”
    He’s doing a lot more than TCoB. He absolutely coddles the big industries and screws workers and the environment. Follow the money:

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 16, 2004 @ 8:48 pm

  15. I see your lips moving.. I feel the hot air.. but all I hear is ‘blah blah blah blah blah blah blah’.

    Comment by rachel — August 16, 2004 @ 9:32 pm

  16. i should have known gus. you are firmly aboard the spearation of church and state means the elimination of church from state crowd. wrong again my friend. separation simply means that religion cannot control the govt.

    it does NOT mean that people cannot pray, or receive funding.

    next thing you know, the liberals will be trying to exclude christians from receiving any type of governmental aid. they are after all religious.

    all of the presidents have been christian before. catch a clue gus. christians are getting upset. the constitution can change. i’m not advocating it. but you need to be careful, lest you (liberals) inspire something you really don’t want.

    Comment by mlah — August 16, 2004 @ 10:27 pm

  17. opensecrets? when i went to that url, the first thing to come up was a donations page. i guess that really says everything about their motivations.

    bush absolutely coddles big business? jedi mind trick? didn’t work. screws workers and the environment? again with the jedi mind trick.

    and don’t cite that link you pasted. i am not going to research your points for you. yet another favorite trick of the left, get conservatives to do their work for them. nope, not gonna happen. and especially at that crap site? they just want money.

    Comment by mlah — August 16, 2004 @ 10:31 pm

  18. “I see your lips moving.. I feel the hot air.. but all I hear is ‘blah blah blah blah blah blah blah’.”
    Call a doctor, it probably means you’re retarded.

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 17, 2004 @ 2:48 am

  19. “christians are getting upset. the constitution can change. i’m not advocating it. but you need to be careful, lest you (liberals) inspire something you really don’t want”
    You mean they have even more hatefulness and power-mongering on tap than they’ve spewed so far? Hard to believe!
    “opensecrets? when i went to that url, the first thing to come up was a donations page. i guess that really says everything about their motivation”
    So in other words it’s like your links to JihadWatch and Day by Day???
    Here’s the M.O. of
    ” The Center for Responsive Politics is a non-partisan, non-profit research group based in Washington, D.C. that tracks money in politics, and its effect on elections and public policy. The Center conducts computer-based research on campaign finance issues for the news media, academics, activists, and the public at large. The Center’s work is aimed at creating a more educated voter, an involved citizenry, and a more responsive government.

    Support for the Center comes from a combination of foundation grants and individual contributions. The Center accepts no contributions from businesses or labor unions.”

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 17, 2004 @ 3:47 am

  20. hatefulness and powermongering? wow. ever heard of the inquisition? yeah, religion can be much worse. try and go to church every now and again, you might actually find out that they’re not so hateful.

    my links to jihadwatch and day by day. those are listed under my favorites, because i like to read them. i have never represented them as fact, though most of what they print is.

    opensecrets. tracks money in politics? you mean that tracks money in their pockets! “The Center conducts computer-based research on campaign finance issues for the news media, academics, activists, and the public at large.” the first three of those are all liberal. i bet the last, the public at large, was just an afterthought. just like for liberals in general. the public is supposed to just listen (to the first three) and follow, not think.

    partisan org my friend. don’t believe it? i have one word for you. foxnews! they’re fair and balanced right? no? they said so! say it all the time. must be true. must be.

    opensecrets says they’re non-partisan. must be true. must be!

    Comment by mlah — August 17, 2004 @ 9:54 am

  21. Dimwit, it’s based on public information. You can also check who gives money to democrats. Go ahead, I dare ya. You have a profoundly closed mind, it’s really quite startling sometimes. It’s extremely tacky and I can’t believe you have any friends.

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 17, 2004 @ 3:12 pm

  22. trial lawyers give money to democrats! what a surprise. biggest donators hands down.

    based on public info? sfw! that doesn’t make it non partisan. opensecrets is a liberal shill.

    i think you are the one with the closed mind.

    Comment by mlah — August 18, 2004 @ 1:07 am

  23. Again, you’re just being contrary because you don’t like my other opinions. That’s hateful, no other word for it. If you can prove they are partisan, go ahead. Or even find someone on the web who agrees with you. Otherwise (as usual), you be talking outta yer ass and everyone knows it. Why do you keep putting yourself in this shameful position?

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 18, 2004 @ 1:52 am

  24. gus, so in the new parlance of the Leftists, anyone who disagrees with your pov is hateful? wow. so that’s how you will squash all dissent! and once you can force us to adopt European (and Canadian) legal opinion (which, btw, is exactly what some of the Supremes are doing, by their own admission), any kind of preaching coming from those Southern Baptist pulpits which you don’t agree with (eg, the arguement that gayness is a sin) will land the preacher man in jail for inciting hate. I have had discussions with your ilk, wherein suddenly they attack the various brands of Christian (again, Southern Baptist appears to be a favorite target) saying that they are worse than the Taliban ever was, and will be forced to the sidelines of our society just like the KKK.

    Bush was an alcoholic and rumored to have used hard drugs 20-30 years ago? Oh, the horror. At least First Husband-to-be Billy Boy never inhaled, right? Nor did his paramour Monica? (ba-dum-dum)

    Bush doesn’t pretend to pay attention to anything bipartisan? How about the Secretary of Transportation and other olive branches he tried to extend to the Socialists (er, Democrats)? Your words betray you, son. Bipartisan in your vernacular means total capitulation to your point of view.

    Your whole concept of separation of church and state is a shiboleth of the left. Doesn’t mean wipe out religion in our society (but only the religion practised by those old dead white men who had the temerity to found our society). It means that the government won’t establish a state religion (ala the Church of England) which would have precluded the optional worship of the deity of your choice (the Pilgrims who’s chutzpah we celebrate every Thanksgiving were religious refugees from England). But your side has twisted that to mean that all Christians must be fed to the lions, and only minority religious beliefs (or lack thereof) can be honored. For goodness sake, the 10 Commandments is basically the code of conduct for a moral society (less, of course, number one, which is admittedly a monotheistic order; the tenth one is an injunction to take a day off every week, lest you work yourself to death). But of course, your side doesn’t like morals, because that implies a judgement of some sort, and who are we to judge anyone else? (I’ll try to remember that when I report for jury duty in a couple of weeks).

    BTW Mlah, when I’m in the jury box undergoing screening, be advised that I believe in the death penalty for speeders.

    Comment by yup — August 18, 2004 @ 7:38 am

  25. gus, this irt a post of yours from a while back: Kerry also said “wages are falling” when in fact they are increasing…He bases that on disputed analysis from a liberal think tank. —

    does opensecrets keep track of the indirect donations of individuals who for all intents and purposes are companies unto themselves? I speak of the likes of Geo. Soros, Bruce Springsteen, et al. Or how about the likes of, who have no reporting requirements because they are ‘issue’ organizations and not campaigning for a particular candidate or party? the Left rakes in more money than is apparent on the surface. you choose not to dig for the embarrasing truth, it seems.

    “hijacking us into darkness”????? Poetic but meaningless. Jedi mind trick attempt, again. The Iraqi Olympic team is able to compete today without worrying about having their feet chopped off if they fail to win gold.

    1000 of our military have died in the Global War on Terror. They gave their lives doing what they signed up to do. Some of my friends in uniform have died sitting in garrison (auto accidents, disease), waiting to be called to do what they had signed up to do. In the course of 1 1/2 years, how many service people die here in the US due to non-combat causes (including training accidents)? Can you tell me how the 1000 combat-related deaths in that period compares to non-combat related death statistics for the same demographic? How many civilians in this country died on 9/11? Can you compare that to the number of deaths normal in a 3-hour period in this country? Which is the greater tragedy? Which is the true darkness?

    You decry that W appears to “Forget the UN and Europe” Well, seems to me that Europe are a bunch of hypocrits. They condemn Israel for building a fence to protect themselves from Palestinian terrorists. Yet the EU is building a huge fence along the Polish and Hungarian borders to protect themselves, get this, from illegal immigrants coming from Russia and the Ukraine!

    Comment by yup — August 18, 2004 @ 8:37 am

  26. I’m not disputing Israel’s need to build the wall at all, as long as they put it on their own territory. Screw the settlements, they’re illegal. They want to carve into Palestinian territory as deeply and as permanently as possible, with as much disruption as possible, and that makes every neutral party, which I used to be, sick to their stomachs.
    Here is the link to opensecrets methodology:
    Kerry’s economic numbers is referring to this?–
    Good for you for bringing some rigor to the debates around here. Bless your heart, Yup! I understand and must agree now. I’m a big enough man to do so, unlike some I won’t name. We all wait with bated breath for those Census Bureau figures Aug. 26 on whether the middle class is indeed growing or not.
    Sorry, I can’t go along with your comparison of the 9-11 deathcount with soldiers in Iraq. Al Queda and terrorism have nothing to do with Iraq. All the service personnel lost in Iraq were optional, and Bush must take personal blame for all of them and the 5000+ injured as well.
    Buddy, I’m not forcing anyone to adopt international law, that’s beyond my power, get a little perspective. Free speech will in all likelihood continue to allow preachers to get all freaky on gays. However, looking to other countries that have allowed gay marriage and somehow not fallen into the flaming pits of hell ought indeed to teach us something. It’s nothing but irrational fear that comes out as hatefulness, yes. Obviously it’s not Taliban-level hatefulness, but still public policy ought to rely on rationality and equality under the law.
    “Bush was an alcoholic and rumored to have used hard drugs 20-30 years ago? Oh, the horror.”
    Haha, that was Mlah who brought that up, I stayed out of that one!
    Sec’y of Transportation, ooh that’s some pretty sexy policy! Mineta was vice president of Lockheed Martin, defense contractor extrordinaire. (“His campaign contributors included Northwest Airlines, United Airlines, Greyhound, Boeing and Union Pacific.”– What other olive branches are you referring to? I’m really curious. This is the most viciously partisan White House ever, esp. considering that he just barely squeaked into office.
    Wanting the keep the separation of churh and state has nothing to do with somehow censuring paranoid Christians. It’s about keeping public money going to public outlets. And not basing public policy on what the freaking Bible says, unless it stands up to scientific scrutiny. Evolve, motherf*ckers!!!

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 19, 2004 @ 2:47 am

  27. no gus, medium john broght up the bush and crack cocaine question. i answered.

    i agree israel should have built the wall in israel and not in the west bank. no, the settlements are not illegal. they’re called immigrants. and further, you assume the west bank is palestinian land. who says? 1948, it was jordanian land. israel occupied it in 63. it is palestinian if israel says so. truth of the real world.

    iraq has nothing to do with terrorists? ever hear of abu nidal? black september? they were ba’athists. and guess where their office was right up until the start of gulf war 2. abu nidal was murdered right before the war. rumor had it that he pissed off uday. but further rumor has it that he knew too much about iraq’s activites in the terror realm, and saddam knew it was his ass if nidal was caught. and so, saddam himself had nidal put down.

    you can admit when you are wrong? start with admitting iraq had terror ties.

    Comment by mlah — August 19, 2004 @ 9:43 am

  28. “start with admitting iraq had terror ties”
    Some, but none that targeted the US homeland or its interests. From the State Department’s 2000 assessment of state-sponsored terrorism: “The regime has not attempted an anti-Western terrorist attack since its failed plot to assassinate former President Bush in 1993 in Kuwait.”
    Oh, hell, let’s go to war anyway…

    There are plenty of rumors about Nidal. A dead man who suffered from leukemia with bullets in his head, is all we know for sure. He was expelled by Sadaam in 1983 with pressure from the US (we were allies w/ Saddam at the time). His time there was spent terrorizing the PLO and Syria. It was said that he was actually working for Israel, for no terrorist– except Begin himself– served their PR better. He only did a couple of jobs (out of like 900!) against Israel.

    Mlah, in all seriousness and respect, what do you think is THE SOLUTION to the Israel-Palestine thing? Haven’t the Palestinians kinda gotten screwed? I’m not picking a fight with you on this, you seem informed and I will take what you say and learn from it. Hasn’t the US coddled Israel?

    Yes, it was MedJohn re:W & coke, my bad. It stuck in my head that you told the story before I got a chance to do so!

    Comment by f-in_cheney — August 19, 2004 @ 2:51 pm

  29. Everything Else

    This gives new meaning to the word AWOL.

    In case of emergency, install this, can’t say you weren’t warned.

    Sometimes you get tired of their whining about it all being Bush’s fault, no matter if it’s someone else’s ad or a question of timing,…

    Trackback by Mind of Mog — August 20, 2004 @ 1:28 am

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