mlah The “culture” that has evolved here isn’t conducive to sissies

February 3, 2004

Pick up Strategies

Filed under: Humor — mlah @ 11:12 pm

i suck at meeting chicks. all my pick up lines are horrible. i usually go so far bad that they think i’m making a joke. i get by with that for a little while.

i buy them stuff. i lie, cheat and steal. i’ve even tried plying them with liquor. hey, whatever works, and southern comfort is a time honored method.

i bought a new car this past summer. just a little vw gti. it’s pretty loaded. my old del sol was just getting a little tired. after insisting on a blue v6 against the dealers wishes i got the pleasure of picking from 2 specified gti’s in maryland. they were both identical, except one had the coveted ‘winter’ package. the winter package includes exactly, heated mirrors and heated seats. for the whooping price of 150 ducats.

what the hell. it was summer, but i do live in md.

it is now winter. sleet snow, freezing rain, all that crap.

let me tell you what. that is turning into about the best 150$ i ever spent. i actually have girls jockeying for position in my car. pushing others into the back (and unheated) seats. then triumphantly dialing the heat up to 5 and exalting the virtues of the ‘butt warmer’ over their own unheated car seats.

it is rapidly becoming the best pick up line in my repertoire. want to grab lunch? i have heated seats!

thank you vw.


  1. Dave, this is -not yet – a comments to ur writings, but just to say hello from Holland. i have a log of myself, too but that is in the Dutch. When you have a catchy subject, mayby i add some lines to it.

    Comment by Tom — February 4, 2004 @ 3:21 am

  2. I can vouch for this story-I’m all about the buttwarmer! My next car will have one!

    Madame Butterfly

    Comment by Madame Butterfly — February 5, 2004 @ 7:47 pm

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