mlah The “culture” that has evolved here isn’t conducive to sissies

February 29, 2004

Nemesis

Filed under: Martial Arts — mlah @ 12:29 am

Dot winds up to break a brick

ever wonder what it takes to get a black belt? if you haven’t ever taken martial arts, you probably don’t have a real clear idea. lots of work? of course, but how much do you think is a lot?

2+ years for me so far. i’m a blue belt. i work out for an hour 4 days a week, and have a 2 hour extra workout on saturday morning. yesterday morning we did 20 windsprints. then we ran a hill for 10 minutes. i’m 38. that was just a quarter of our workout.
(more…)

February 28, 2004

Passion of the Christ – Take 2

Filed under: Politics — mlah @ 4:05 pm

Roman Jailers beat THE man

i went to the movies yesterday and saw the movie. THE movie. it was a very powerful event. The movie was not what i expected. i was prepared for gore, but it was actually more graphic than i expected.

the story line had a lot to offer as well. i don’t know how accurate the story line is compared to actual history, but there was a lot there that i had no idea occurred.

if you plan to see the movie, quit reading now. i don’t want to ruin it for you.
(more…)

February 26, 2004

How big is an inch?

Filed under: Whining — mlah @ 8:16 pm

Some random model!

i went to the store yesterday to buy some new jeans. sounds simple enough doesn’t it? you go in, you pick out your size, if you can find them, and you pay.

but noooooooo, nothing can be that easy.

well, i thought it would be that easy, and in fact, i did just what i said above. except i made one small change, that totally messed me up.
(more…)

February 24, 2004

Anti Semitism

Filed under: Religion — mlah @ 8:48 pm

See the flick!

yep, i’m going to write a little about mel gibson’s upcoming ‘passion of the Christ’. but this won’t be what you expect.

i have a tendency to do that. surprise people. i’m kind of a big whote guy. people usually mistake me for being a little bit ‘slow’ at first impression. they usually make up their mind before we ever talk. i get kind of the same thing about religion. seems like my proclivity for an occasional beer and a boys night out somehow equates to my being an atheist. friends are usually pretty surprised when they actually find out how religious i am.
(more…)

February 22, 2004

Beer Pong

Filed under: Humor — mlah @ 1:38 pm

Rose and Gene shoot their beers after hitting an opposing beer can

these are bowie, maryland rules for beer pong.

i spent last night over at js’ house, in the basement, playing beer pong. i think this game is native to the east coast, if not maryland alone. i’d never heard of it ’til i got here. and there are apparently many different versions. we played bowie rules.
(more…)

February 17, 2004

be careful what you ask for

Filed under: Humor — mlah @ 11:05 pm

in january of ’97 i got appendicitis. i was still in the navy and stationed in spain. the corpsmen reffered to me as ‘the appendectomy from hell’ not because i was difficult, but because i was there for a week.
(more…)

February 16, 2004

my email died!

Filed under: Whining — mlah @ 7:21 pm

well, not everyone elses did.

a long, long time ago. i was constantly traveling. the navy kept sending me around to various places to catch ships and subs. it was not always very easy to check my home email. my old dave at tnet dot es (spain, where i lived) just wasn’t that accessable from turkey, israel, or the u. s. for that matter.
(more…)

February 15, 2004

Fighting Ourselves…..

Filed under: Martial Arts — mlah @ 3:11 pm

Dave's Md Senior State Medals

yeah, we’re schizo like that…

the medals to the right are mine, more pictures will follow. i have to rip my video in as mpegs and then capture some stills, so there will hopefully be a decent pic of me in action. don’t hold your breathe!

my school, Vuongs TKD, did very well. i don’t know if it was the biggest showing he ever had for a tournament, but there were 6 adults alone. 15-20 kids came and fought as well. i’ll post a total medal count when i can tally the stats.

i won in sparring, out of three people. that means i’m state champ, and qualify for nationals again. want to know something funny? top three performers in each division qualify, so in actuality, all three of us qualified for nationals. :)

i came in third in sparring. out of three. i like to call that last. and yep. i qualified for nationals there too. :)

we had a lot of matches between students from our own school, which is lamentable. we spar each other all the time. we go to these tournaments hoping for a new opponent. someone you can try all your devious little tricks on, and then kick them in the head!

we had three boys in particular, all around 8, and blue belts. so they were in the same division. total of 5 in their division. our school came in 1,2,3 in sparring and forms. that’s good, but it also means we were fighting ourselves….. and that’s no fun.

but speaking of kicks to the melon….
(more…)

February 11, 2004

Maryland State TKD

Filed under: Martial Arts — mlah @ 11:11 pm

This photo is from the USTU Senior Nationals

well, for those of y’all who don’t know me personally, i take taekwondo. i practice a lot. i’ve even started to teach a little, only the little kids, and the lower belts at that.

we have a tournament this saturday. it’s actually the maryland senior state championships. i’ll be competing in the forms and sparring competitions. as long as i finish at least third, i’ll qualify for nationals.

no the picture is not me. i got the photo from the USTU. it is the national governing body for U.S. tkd participation in the olympics.

for those of y’all who are local, the competition is at essex community college, northeast of baltimore. should run from 10 ’til around 6. i expect to do my form around 10:30, and spar around 4:30.

wish me luck and i’ll keep y’all posted here. want to know more about it? check out ‘my taekwondo school’ to the left in my favorite sites.

February 10, 2004

Clubbing in Turkey

Filed under: Sea Stories — mlah @ 11:22 pm

me aboard the Scott in Antalya, Turkey

back in the day….

i was in the Navy for 9 years. i have lots of sea stories. y’all are going to get to enjoy them.

My first trip out to sea was on the USS Monterey (CG-61). it was a good ship. i didn’t know it then, but ships have personalities.
(more…)

February 8, 2004

Spies like Us

Filed under: Politics — mlah @ 9:32 pm

040408.jpg

anybody hear of Katherine Gun? She’s an american who was working for GCHQ until she was fired last march. Turns out miss gun leaked (made public) an email between NSA and gchq which apparently discussed spying on diplomats at the U.N.

a group on the left, who like to call themselves the ‘opponents of war’ (i can think of a few other adjectives for them) is trying build this lady up as a heroine for her courage and bravery.

seems the article dealt with eavesdropping on 6 particular countires who were swing votes in the un. The U.S. wanted to know what they needed to do to win their votes for the liberation (i used that word on purpose) of iraq. mz gun decided it was illegal, and decided on her own to violate british official secrets laws (for which she has been charged) to help stop the war; and therefore, help prevent potential suffering of the iraqi people.

somebody thinks she’s cool. somebody thinks she’s brave.

i think she’s a pinhead. to borrow a visual from Allah she needs to be whipped with a car antennae. then i’d like a large rock dropped on her. does she realize she is risking american/britsih/coalition lives?

the whole point of a democracy is that you get a “vote”, not “your way”. you get to cast your vote. when you lose, you are supposed to be in the “loyal minority”. the loyal minority, or the existance thereof, is a pillar of democracy. breaking laws, especially when it risks your own countrymens lives, because you disagree with a policy of your government is violating a basic tenet of democracy.

who is it that does not know the U.S. spies? the crux of mz gun’s argument was that the wiretaps (evesdropping) were illegal, and the war was illegal, so it should be ok for her to break the law (british offical secrets act, and yes she was in britain) again? two wrongs make a right? was she not paying attention at age three? pinhead i tell you.

of course the U.S. spies. we apparently tried to go away from human being operatives in the field doing the spying a while back, and rely on hello, guess what satelites. what do those satelites do? take pictures? and i bet they LISTEN! eavesdropping. what is this ladies problem?
see this for little info about Francis Gary Powers, and U.S. spying. Ike acknowledged we spy, and would continue.

if the U.S. government is NOT spying, then they aren’t earning my taxes. GET BUSY!

February 7, 2004

You Can’t See Me

Filed under: Humor — mlah @ 11:18 pm

know why? because i’m invisible.

so i’m a little superstitious. i knock on wood. i throw salt over my shoulder. i walk around ladders. i have a lucky shirt. 23 and 15 are my lucky numbers.

when i go to vegas, i lose money because i am there to gamble. when i go with friends to someplace that happens to have some slots or blackjack and i play while waiting, i win money. (knock knock knock knock knock, there must be five knocks after all)

i don’t give knives as presents, i sell them. i throw salt over my shoulder. i freaked when one of my best friends had drinks with his fiance’ the night before their wedding. O.U. lost the sugar bowl because i was sitting on the wrong end of my couch.

the list goes on and on.

so why am i invisible?

for some strange reason, there is an abundance of cars here in maryland with a headlight out. you all KNOW what that means. whenever you see a car with one headlight out, you have to knock on the windshield.

it is an IMPERATIVE! you see, knocking on the glass makes you invisible to cops.

no, really. no…… really. Really man, they totally can’t see you. seriously. try it.

knock on the glass. don’t get tickets. what do you have to lose? and you must knock on the glass BEFORE the car passes you. you don’t have much time. and if you manage to hit the glass as you traverse an intersection; well, you’re just the bomb. you’re like double invisible to cops.

all my friends seem to think i’m wrong about this. they keep telling me i’m wrong, and they keep on writing checks out to the cops……

(knock knock knock knock knock)….

February 5, 2004

Torment

Filed under: Women — mlah @ 9:46 pm

ok, here’s a post with no socially redeeming value.

Alyssa Milano is hot only to torment me. hmmm, what’s that you say? you think i’m conceited? well, we’ll see.

a long time ago i actually saw the governator movie ‘commando’ in the theatre. i was a huge ah-nold fan, and still am. if memory serves, ahnold was an east german (that’s how long ago this movie was made, there were still two germanys, and france loved them both) expatriate special forces type working for us. when some limey mercenary type double crossed him and duly received his comeuppance. this movie was the all time great for ah-nold one liners. well, it just so happens that ah-nold was ahead of murphy brown, and was a single parent.seems ah-nold had a young daughter.

and here’s the beginning of the rub. ah-nolds little daughter was played by some little curly haired brunette. i didn’t even find her that pretty. in fact, i think i actually said ‘jeez, you’d think they could find a pretty little girl to play his daughter’.

well, ah-nolds daughter in commando was played by none other than little miss alyssa. i don’t know if it was her first movie or not, but it is the first time i saw her. yep, i opened my giant cavernous mouth wide enough for both feet.

fast forward past the ‘who’s the boss’ era (until she’s of age) and little miss alyssa is svelte miss milano. this is also the time when my friends made me aware of the fact that this is the same little girl from commando.

and now, many endeavors later, and just one more big pile of crow after the next keeps getting piled up on my plate.

did y’all know she has platinum albums in J.A. pan? is killer in ‘charmed’; which she helps produce, has been on the covers of maxim and stuff. She and her mom started an internet company to chase down online purveyors of porn who were illegally trading in her likeness.

and now. this very night. as i prepared this post, while searching for a pic of her to include in this post, what little tidbit of info did i stumble across on the WB page ? she gardens topless!

TORMENT i tell you

God has made Alyssa Milano uber hot just to torment me.

and now i have to go get out my copy of ‘Embrace of the Vampire’

February 3, 2004

Pick up Strategies

Filed under: Humor — mlah @ 11:12 pm

i suck at meeting chicks. all my pick up lines are horrible. i usually go so far bad that they think i’m making a joke. i get by with that for a little while.

i buy them stuff. i lie, cheat and steal. i’ve even tried plying them with liquor. hey, whatever works, and southern comfort is a time honored method.

i bought a new car this past summer. just a little vw gti. it’s pretty loaded. my old del sol was just getting a little tired. after insisting on a blue v6 against the dealers wishes i got the pleasure of picking from 2 specified gti’s in maryland. they were both identical, except one had the coveted ‘winter’ package. the winter package includes exactly, heated mirrors and heated seats. for the whooping price of 150 ducats.

what the hell. it was summer, but i do live in md.

it is now winter. sleet snow, freezing rain, all that crap.

let me tell you what. that is turning into about the best 150$ i ever spent. i actually have girls jockeying for position in my car. pushing others into the back (and unheated) seats. then triumphantly dialing the heat up to 5 and exalting the virtues of the ‘butt warmer’ over their own unheated car seats.

it is rapidly becoming the best pick up line in my repertoire. want to grab lunch? i have heated seats!

thank you vw.

The Deadly Castor Bean

Filed under: Politics — mlah @ 12:13 am

well, they confirmed that the ‘mysterious’ white powder found at the senate is ricin. pretty nasty little powder. you grow some castor beans, get out the Anarchists Cookbook, and follow the recipe to make ricin. supposedly an amount the size of a pinhead can kill. Since it’s organic, it doesn’t leave a whole lot of trace in the body. kills in around 3 days and has no known antidote.

i don’t know which i would rather have. anthrax going through the mail, or ricin. which is the lesser of the two evils? i think they’re both on a par.

they really need to catch these guys. i want them dead. they should give them the choice of ricin or anthrax. i live just outside of dc and i’m really tired of all these wmd’s going through the mail.

Older Posts »

Powered by WordPress